Thursday, July 08, 2004
From the beginning
Those moments in our lives that tell us who we are or where we're going. They are those moments where we come to some very sudden realizations. They are those times when we either react suddenly or cause us to take some course of action that will define us for ourselves or in the eyes of others.
For myself, every time I react to some defining moment I seem to end up in trouble. When I react to one of those moments I am running on pure emotion. Every time I take my time and allow that moment to sink in and take planned steps as a course of action I seem to do better. Early in my life I reacted most of the time and it has caused a great deal of pain to myself and sometimes others, further defining myself. I didn't always like what was happening, but I didn't have the tools to stop it. Emotion ran me like a runaway train. It took years before I developed a discipline and by then I had already defined my path in life.
The very first defining moment in my life (that I can remember) came when I was five years old and was at the end of my kindergarten year. I was already reading and doing some arithmetic. I loved numbers and I loved to learn. I was a sponge for learning everything I could, especially in science. And yet they were thinking of NOT promoting me to first grade. I wanted to learn more, I had to learn more. I was passionate about it.
I remember my mother and teacher having a meeting about whether or not I would go on to first grade and I remember that teacher saying "he can't go to first grade because he can't tie his shoes". I remember thinking "what does she know", I hate tieing my shoes. That's why I always slipped them on or went barefoot. And besides she always made us practice with some stupid plastic shoe that I really did not think look like a real shoe. To me it was a toy.
So while my mom and teacher were arguing I went over to the shelves, where that plastic shoe sat, and brought it over to them, sat it down and tied it right in front of the two of them. From that moment on I wouldn't let anyone else tell me what I could or could not do.
These moments came quite often in my early years and have stayed with me for a lifetime. They have defined me whether I wanted them to or not.
For myself, every time I react to some defining moment I seem to end up in trouble. When I react to one of those moments I am running on pure emotion. Every time I take my time and allow that moment to sink in and take planned steps as a course of action I seem to do better. Early in my life I reacted most of the time and it has caused a great deal of pain to myself and sometimes others, further defining myself. I didn't always like what was happening, but I didn't have the tools to stop it. Emotion ran me like a runaway train. It took years before I developed a discipline and by then I had already defined my path in life.
The very first defining moment in my life (that I can remember) came when I was five years old and was at the end of my kindergarten year. I was already reading and doing some arithmetic. I loved numbers and I loved to learn. I was a sponge for learning everything I could, especially in science. And yet they were thinking of NOT promoting me to first grade. I wanted to learn more, I had to learn more. I was passionate about it.
I remember my mother and teacher having a meeting about whether or not I would go on to first grade and I remember that teacher saying "he can't go to first grade because he can't tie his shoes". I remember thinking "what does she know", I hate tieing my shoes. That's why I always slipped them on or went barefoot. And besides she always made us practice with some stupid plastic shoe that I really did not think look like a real shoe. To me it was a toy.
So while my mom and teacher were arguing I went over to the shelves, where that plastic shoe sat, and brought it over to them, sat it down and tied it right in front of the two of them. From that moment on I wouldn't let anyone else tell me what I could or could not do.
These moments came quite often in my early years and have stayed with me for a lifetime. They have defined me whether I wanted them to or not.
Dana Megyesi 4:27 PM